You know that feeling you get in your gut when you’re just not sure your if current relationship is working out? It feels like a frenzy of mixed emotions — we’ve all been there. But sometimes a relationship has to end for you to find the person you’re truly meant to be with. Signs You’re Headed Toward a Breakup.
A recent Reddit post asked users to share the signs that helped them realize it was time to break up with their significant others and more than 11,600 people chimed in. Here are some of their responses:
You delay meeting your partner.
“When you get home, you find yourself sitting in your car, just taking a few extra minutes and some deep breaths before you go inside. Unless you have kids; if you have kids this is totally normal.”
Memories are better than reality. “When you miss the memories more than your partner.”
Relaxation is impossible.
“From personal experience, I would have to say when I find that I am unable to relax around my current partner. If I feel on edge because I’m nervous that we are going to get into an argument, or I have to be on my best behavior to make you want to hang out with me, then we are headed for a break up. I broke up with my last ex when I realized that my hands were shaking once [when] I got in my car after hanging out.”
Missing who they used to be.
“In my last relationship, I found myself reminiscing about the person they were in the past and hoping the person they became would go back to the sweet, non-manipulative person I first met.”
Hanging out is an obligation.
“When spending time together feels like a chore, not a pleasant afternoon. (Some time apart is normal and healthy. I’m specifically talking about a sense of dread that wasn’t present beforehand.)”
When thinking about your future, you don’t envision your partner there. “You hesitate to make future plans with them.”
Behavior is awfully shady.
“They’re very similar to the signs that you’re heading for a layoff. Secret meetings that you’re not invited to. Excessive recriminations for minor infractions. Making sure that somebody else can take care of all of your official duties.”
He’s quick to point our your differences.
“When your significant other goes out of their way to find differences between the two of you. It’s subtle, but I think it happens when people are trying to justifying going out with someone else. They try to find as many differences between themselves and their current partner to make it seem like it’s not a good fit, and they find more and more similarities with the new partner.”
You’re quick to find his flaws.
“My grandpa used to say, ‘When you want to buy a new car, it becomes easy to see what’s wrong with the current one.’ I didn’t realize until later how applicable this is to much more than just cars.”
You dodge your partner’s phone calls.
“Your phone rings, it’s her, and you don’t want to answer.”
You can’t find anything to talk about.
“If you have nothing to talk about it probably isn’t because you’re spending so much time together, but more likely you have a lack of common interests.”
Texting patterns change.
“I also noticed a change in the way texts were being written. Texts are always hard because it doesn’t do a good job of showing emotion or tone of voice and whatnot. But, if you are texting a significant other daily for years, you absolutely can tell shifts in this. Shorter, more punctual sentences, and added punctuation. My ex started ending all her text sentences with periods, and she never did. I think it is a way of trying to sound more dismissive through texts.”